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Cigars & Football – A Simple Blend

Week 8 Preview

Week 8 Preview

It was announced today that the sixth book in the Game of Thrones series, “A Song of Ice and Fire”, Winds of Winter, has been pushed back until 2016, which is most disappointing. I had actually already marked off two weeks in December with anticipation of reading that book. It’ll take my daughter about two days to read it, but, then, she’s smarter than me (don’t tell her). I guess I’ll have to go Christmas shopping instead. But it did get me thinking, if the Conferences of College football could be broken down into the houses of Game of Thrones, who would they be? Listen up all you radical fans of the books, this is not a direct comparison, I’m sure I have not taken everything into account, so let it go.

Greyjoys-the Iron Born, – This would be the Big 12, that only has ten teams. This is a conference that so wants to be in charge and they truly believe they are capable of taking on the entire kingdom, only they find themselves coming up short, and none of the other houses takes them seriously (because they don’t have a conference championship game) and their main character is a captured spoiled brat who spends his days getting tortured, (that school would be Texas).

Baylor vs. West Virginia – this is a game that everyone should take their date to, because everybody is going to score. Could be interesting, if you think about it. Talk about teams that think defense is only a temporary concern, it’s these two. Baylor is the only undefeated team in the Big 12, minus two. They don’t get rattled, they were behind by 24 points to TCU in the fourth quarter, and people in the nation said, “that’s not enough points for TCU”, and they were right! West “By Golly” Virginia is no TCU, they have no defense, as in none! The Bears are going to score all day, of course, so is WVU, maybe just not as often.


Kansas State is known to upset Oklahoma, they don’t always pull it off, they save it for when the game is significant. Right now K-State is 2-0 in conference play and OU is 2-1. The Sooners got back on track against Texas but did anybody else notice that the Charlie Strong coached team never quit and fought its way back into the game? CSF did. Even though there wasn’t a doubt about who was going to win, the Longhorns made it interesting. The Wildcats are better than Texas, when they don’t turn the ball over, they also wear purple, and that color is a hex to OU. K-State wins.


Oklahoma State takes on the Horn Frogs, might not be their first choice for this week’s foe. TCU scored a staggering 59 points last week – and lost! The Horny Toads haven’t seen 59 points since before my daughter was born. OSU struggled against Kansas. They might have overlooked the Jayhawks but that’s immaterial. TCU captures another scalp.

Lannisters- The Lions– this family would be the Big Ten. The family has been one of the strongest in the land, they want to rule but just can’t quite pull it off, they are very high on themselves and for the past few years have been utterly bankrupt. Most of their power comes from tradition and accomplishments from yester-years. Maybe they will get it back, but not this year.


Michigan State meets SEC-killer Indiana. Still having trouble accepting the fact that Indy beat Mizzou, at Missouri, on Homecoming. The Spartans are the bullies of the Big Ten. They are Tywin Lannister, feared and hated, but, until someone is able to shoot them with a crossbow, they’re going to be on top. Indiana could be mistaken for Tyrion Lannister, who does actually kill his father Tywin, but not this time.

Nebraska already has one loss, they are due three more. The Cornhuskers could be Cersei, stuck up, always having to lie to get what she wants and cursed never to get it. Northwestern has beaten Penn State and Wisconsin! What? Huh? Really? Yep, the Wildcats upset them both and they’re going to take down Nebraska too. The Curse of the Hat will not die!

Jaime Lannister will be played by Minnesota, a man that, when we first met, we hated. But, now that we know his backstory, and the fact that he is having to redefine himself and he’s trying to be honorable, even though its difficult, we like him. The Gophers, even with all their faults, we just can’t help but pull for them. They will be hosting Purdue, who played the Michigan State Spartans tough but came up a little short. Probably going to come up a little short against the Gophers, too.

House Baratheon of Storm’s End would be the ACC. Just like Robert Baratheon, Florida State was able to lead a rebellion and take over the Kingship of the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros. And, like poor Robert, FSU has no idea how to lead, or how to handle the role of being King. Which, of course, leads to their downfall.

Florida State plays Notre Dame, but the game’s not what everyone is reporting or taking about. The eyes of the college football world are fixed on the stupid antics of Jameis Winston. Now it looks like he did the same thing Todd Gurley of Georgia did, only Coach Jimbo Fisher doesn’t have the fortitude to suspend Winston. Fisher is going to cause this program to fall into disrepute quickly, just like Robert Baratheon did!

The role of Stannis Baratheon has yet to be decided, but Virginia and Duke will vie for that honor. Virginia is coming along very quietly and they just might upset the Blue Devils. Can you believe I wrote that, beating Duke would constitute an upset? Since when is Duke favored over anyone? Since Cutcliffe, as a matter of fact. The Blue Devils have only lost to Miami, and they shouldn’t have, but they did. Then they take down #22 Georgia Tech, so who knows what the (Blue) Devil is going on? UVA seems like they would be good as the younger Baratheon, who doesn’t get the respect he thinks he should.


House Targareyn is none other than the SEC. They might not hold the Kingship at the moment but there is no doubt they’re going to get it back. They are the only House that rode Dragons into battle, how does an Army take down dragons? They didn’t, which is why the Targareyns ruled for 300 years. Sound like a conference we’ve all gotten used to?

First, the wounded dragons, Texas A&M and Alabama. The Aggies are down two SEC games, Bama should be. Two years ago this game 519provided us with fireworks and Johnny Football’s Heisman moment. That’s not going to happen this year. The Crimson Tide needs to establish the run because QB Sims can’t pass the pigskin, so just run. It shouldn’t be too hard to do since A&M’s defense is not known for stopping the run. This also works because they’ve got to keep A&M’s offense off the field. The Aggies know how to pass and Alabama’s secondary is weak, at best. So, Bama, run the ball like there is no tomorrow because one more loss and there won’t be a tomorrow. Oh, one more thing, “Bama!, Stop Turning The Ball OVER!”
The top Dragon of the East is the Georgia Bulldogs. When it looked like they were going down by losing a wing in Todd Gurley, they fooled us all. The team stepped up and shut out Missouri. Arkansas is getting better, they almost pulled the upset last week, but that was almost. UGA (kind-of sounds like a dragon name) remains the top dragon of the east.
The new dragon of the West, and the country, is Ole Miss! The Rebels host a historical foe in Tennessee. Ole Miss has established that they have the best defense in the nation, and their offense is breathing fire! They can’t let up, if they do UT will jump on them and drop them from the ranks of the undefeated. Hotty Toddy! Gosh Almighty!

Who’s ever seen a blue dragon? Well, look at Kentucky, cause here they are, UK is for real and here’s their chance to prove it. The Tigers, Louisiana style, are have lost twice. They have one SEC win, over Florida, and they darn near blew that one. But they did slay the Gator dragon, that slayed the blue dragon. Still, CSF is picking Ken-tuck-y.



The Starks- Direwolves – are the PAC-12. They are a noble house that causes the rest of the Kingdom fits. They are also the main enemy of the Lannisters. The PAC-12 and Big Ten always play in the Rose Bowl, get it? They are rivals, enemies. The Starks give us men who fight a great fight and draw others to follow them only to be ambushed (The Red Wedding) and get wiped out. Now the surviving members of the Stark family are scattered throughout the world. They are either becoming an assassin (Arya) or they are up on the Ice Wall (Jon) fighting the White Walkers, or traveling to places unknown to us mere mortals. Basically nobody knows what they are going to do.

UCLA takes on upstart California. UCLA has had one good game, against Arizona State. The Bruins were picked to be the team to beat in the Southern division of the PAC-12, and they have scraped by in every win but one. California was a bottom-feeder last year and here they are tearing it up. Ok, they didn’t exactly go on a tear last week, but they have shown they are a team to be reckoned with. The Bears win. Not the Bruins, even though they are bears, we’re picking the Golden Bears.

601The favorites of the Left Coast are the Oregon Ducks, who have fallen on hard times, for them. Losing two of their best lineman left them with a gap in their armor. QB Marcus Mariota has carried the team on his shoulders to a 5-1 record. After losing to Arizona again, the team came together against UCLA. If they can keep it together, they’ll be fine. Washington is playing better than expected, but, of course, they did lose to Stanford. The Huskies will give the Ducks a run, but will come up short.

The best game of the night could be Stanford against Arizona State. Stanford should have beaten Notre Dame and USC. Rob Stark should have beaten the Lannisters but, NO, he got ambushed, just like Pat Hayden did to the Cardinal. ASU was playing great ball, then their QB went down and UCLA stomped all over them. The Devils, Sun variety, recovered and took Tommy Trojan’s team down. (Is he still on the Committee? I’m referring to Pat Hayden, football authority and personification of Tommy Trojan.) Now if the largest school in the Nation, Arizona State, can just beat the Stanford defense, the Sun Devils will have an improbable victory. Then, again, we all thought the Starks were going to win the War of Five Kings.


The biggest upset of the day will be Colorado beating USC. Go ahead and laugh and make snide remarks, but, remember, we all thought Eddard “Ned” Stark wasn’t going to get executed, either. The Buffalos are trying to shake the stigma of recent years and are coming on strong. They have been coming up short, but they’ve been competitive and it’s just a matter of time before they pull off an upset. USC has played with fire and has been burned twice. They should have lost against Stanford and Arizona as well. This game has all the makings of an upset and CSF is calling for it. Buffs upset the Trojans!


The role of the Sell Swords will be played by my University of North Alabama Lions. They are now ranked #4th in the nation in Division II. They carry their undefeated record to Melbourne, Florida, to take on the Florida Tech Panthers, who are 4-2. The mighty Lions will sack the Panthers, loot their treasury, burn their cities and…….got a little carried away there,… and continue their climb to that #1 ranking. ROAR LIONS!!


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